Wendy the Water Polo Witch

Boys and Girls.....school started this week.....


Yeah, I said it.....the phrase that strikes fear into the heart, of children, students, parents, teachers, bus drivers and lunch ladies worldwide......


For me, however, I have been kinda looking forward to this semester....after the dust settled on last semester, the score was BIO, CHEM and CALC - 0......Amy - 1. I really kicked last semester's tail (see Mom, I said tail and not ass!)....so this semester I have momentum!


This semester started like any other....minus the fact that I had to wake-up on my sofa instead of a bed since I still am rather homeless and had see my roommate's naked butt (not bad by the way) when I went into his room to get my clothes since that is where my dresser currently lives and he is evidently VERY anti-pajamas.....anywho....I digress.....


I went to my first class (Organic Chemistry) and was promptly handed a syllabus that I mistook for the text book....this sucker is HUGE....this does not bode well for me!


Then....a little sunshine.....I discovered that my second class is in the exact same room as my first....this may not seem like a big deal to you, but I go to one of the largest Universities in the nation....this is a BIG deal.....


Ok....so I am easily impressed, but still.....


I was then released to go to my swimming class! I have been looking forward to this class for months!


First, we do a fitness test to see approximately where we are physically (I already knew the answer to this question....it's a number and it stares up at me from the scale every morning...I don't like that number....) She tells us that she is going to pair us with partners of similar physical abilities for the semester.


After completing the test, our instructor tallies our scores while we introduce ourselves to the other members of the class. There are your typical 18 yr hard bodies that make me want to snap them like a twig (but I'm not bitter).....some older (and much larger) staff members....and the rest of us that range from twig to tank and everywhere in between....



One of the girls that introduced herself added that she is on the UT Water Polo team. She is a really fit girl...not twig....not tank.....just muscles. I mentally laughed "Thank God I won't be paired with her!"

WRONG!

I have no idea what my instructor was thinking, but I got stuck with Wonder Woman....

I asked her if she was sure......I mean, collegiate athlete I am not! Not even close.....I mean Water Polo?

Player...no.......pool buoy...maybe.....

I looked at her and and gave her this apologetic smile that said, "sorry your got stuck with the floatation device", but she just have me this smug little smile and asked "What? Don't you think you could keep up?"

That's it.....bitch is going down!

Mellow Yellow

Today has made me mad from the get go.....but I refuse to even get into it....all I have been doing lately is feeling sorry for myself....even I am getting tired of it....so I am sure you guys are full to here (you can't see me right now but I put my hand up to the top of my head).

Maybe it didn't help that yesterday began and ended on such a high note.

I started my new job yesterday. It is just a typical job, doing typical stuff, but I do NOT have to work nights and weekends anymore, I do NOT get cussed out every other call, and I work in a yellow room.

I know that may not seem like much to you, but to me, it is awesome. Most offices are a lovely Institutional White, Brain numbing Beige, or (my personal favorite) Sky Blue (you were expecting another made-up paint name weren't you....well, I gotta keep you on your toes). Guys, painting the walls Sky Blue does not make me think I am outside....it just makes me wish I were outside all the more.

My new office is BRIGHT yellow, and we don't sit in cubes. We sit facing OPEN windows that lead out into a yard that little girls play in at various times of the day! It's like a room full of happiness! (Ok, so there is one little, tiny, minuscule downside.....these little girls have a pet...skunk....so sometimes the whole open window thing is a little disturbing....but I am trying to focus on the positive here! Geez.... you are so negative.)

Anyway, so I went to work for a while in my lovely yellow room, then my friend Logan called....
he had a craving for homemade burgers and fries. So he called to invite me to eat them with him.

Woo Hoo!

I do love a good burger (I know it is NOT conducive to the whole Christy Brinkley physique I am working towards....but hey it was HOMEMADE burgers and fries....give a girl a break!). But, right after I get the invite for dinner, I get a call back telling me he forgot the gas hadn't been tuned on in their house yet (they just moved into a new house this weekend). So guess what.....he still wants burgers....but can he cook them at my house?

Are you kidding me.....you want to cook me dinner and I don't even have to go anywhere? Oh heck yeah!

While he was cooking dinner, I was registering for the Spring semester.....I am signed up for 8 hours of grueling classes (Organic Chemistry, Biology II and BIO Lab), my last 3 hours of general studies (woo hoo!) (History), and those of you that can add realize that is only 11 hours. I need at least 12 hours to be considered full-time. So....what can I take to get that last hour of credit and not add another HARD class....like calculus or physics......

So I started playing around with the course catalog, seeing what I could find....first I weeded out Basket Weaving....lost art, maybe....something I am willing to pay almost $1000 a class to learn....not even close. That reasoning was also the downfall of Beginners Yiddish, Philosophy and Star Trek, and Daytime Soap Operas: Family and Social Roles.

But then, what do my wondering eyes behold......Swimming: A Water Workout! One hour a week and I get to swim! That puts me at 12 hours! Oh be still my beating heart! But wait....what is this.....Intermediate Co-ed Softball! Oh man! Which do I choose?

I DON'T! I am taking them both! Next semester, three days a week I am in a pool, and the other two days I am on a softball field! HEAVEN.....I'M IN HEAVEN.....oh yeah....plus all those science classes and stuff too!

So now I am sitting in the gym deli after swimming to let off some of the steam of today.....and Tigger just walked by....and a vampire.....and a caveman.....maybe today will be better after all!

Happy Halloween!

Clue! ummmm...in the gym with the pool buoy!

Top 10 Clues I am becoming a gym rat:



10) We have no carpet and pets...so our house needs dusting....A LOT. But, usually NOT the showers.....however, when you use the one at the gym everyday...well, ewwwww.

9) I bought extra sets of cheap hair products and make-up to keep at the gym....but the cheap ones all ended up at home and there is about 100 dollars worth of hair gel in my gym locker.

8) I got invited to the Back To School Party at the house of the guy that swipes the membership cards at the door. His name is Tim.

7) The girl with the locker under me left a note on my locker telling me she likes my perfume. It's a good thing because it usually smells like it in there.....(is that too weird?)

6) My personal trainer gave me a birthday card.

5) I have owned my new purple speedo for not even two months, but it is already too big!

4) Everything I own smells faintly of chlorine.....I mean everything...even Chloe a little...hmmmm......

3) I used to recognize people on campus from classes I have taken. It was "Hey, there's the girl from Gov that always wears those orange Crocs." or "Oooooh, there's hot guy from calculus." (Ok, that one is made up....there are NO hot guys in calculus.) You get the point. Now it's "Hey, it's the guy who swims in the fast lane, but is sooooo not fast lane worthy." and "Oooooh, there's the girl who thinks that the second treadmill from the end is her own personal treadmill and Lord help you if you are on it when she gets there."

2) I caught myself mentally re-arranging my class schedule in respect to proximity to the gym.

and finally........

1) School has been out for two weeks and I STILL have been on campus everyday....and that's just sad!

Who knew?

I learned some things about myself this week from the weirdest places.

1) Although my favorite color is red, I am inexplicably drawn to pink. I thought I was NOT a girl who loved pink. It's such a girly color. However, I went through my clothes this week to get rid of some stuff for Goodwill. (The more I purge, the less I have to move.)

My room is usually a mess. I am really weird in that I am kinda anal in a weird way. Once I start a project, it has to be PERFECT. So, I usually avoid organizing. If I get started, it can't be a quick clean....oh no....it is a four hour job!

However, I thought "I'm moving, so I need to get my clothes and closet in order." BAD IDEA. I have three garbage bags of clothes for Goodwill, and still my closet is packed....and arranged by seasons.....and color coordinated.....with matching hangers....separated by coordinated accessories. AGGGGGGGGHHHHHH.....but it is soooo pretty now.

When I was done, I stepped back to view my handy work. And then it hit me....PINK!!!

Who knew?

2) I am scared of heights. I have known this for a while. Again....this is not your normal I'm-high-off-the-ground-so-I-am-scared fear. Oh no, that would be far too normal for me. If I am strapped into something I am fine. I LOVE roller coasters, airplanes, ski lifts....you get the picture. However, driving on a ledge, hiking on a ledge....pretty much anything where the only thing keeping from falling is well....me.....SCARES THE CRAP OUT OF ME!!!!!! Guys, I'm clumsy....we all know this....if I am what is keeping me from falling....well....the odds are NOT in my favor.

Anyway, this week I learned this fear also extends to deep water. Since the school is closed for the next two weeks between semesters, the outdoor lap pool that I have been using doesn't open until 9 am. I was forced to use the Natatorium (indoor lap pool). Guys....it's like 10 feet!

No need to get into the embarrassing antics that ensued, but just be sure, I won't be in there again...until tomorrow.....Helen is really into torture!

Who knew?

3) I had five of these but apparently my attention span is shorter than I thought...

Who knew?

And they call him the streak.....Don't look Ethel!

I have spent most of my life in transit from one locker room to another. So, subsequently, I am not modest.

Trying to hide your "wobbly bits" and change is just a futile attempt most of the time anyway. Don't get me wrong, I am not one of those weird girls that just strip down and walk around the locker room like it was their bedroom, but it takes a lot to make me blush. I am more modest than I used to be since I now have more that wobbles, but even still....

I took an aerobics class last semester (that I had to drop since I sprained my ankle and was on crutches and a walking boot for most of the semester.....I'm so cool it hurts!) and was assigned a locker in the stadium.

Only about every third shower worked, and only about every other one of those actually had a shower curtain, so you usually waited in line if you wanted one. I did.

This summer I got a locker in Gregory Gym to use after I swim. http://www.utrecsports.org/facilities/virtualtours/list-x.php

It is nice! When tour guides are showing potential students and tuition paying parents around campus, they ALWAYS stop at Gregory. (If you have met my dad, you know this was a HUGE selling point for him.)

Even the locker rooms are great. They are very well equip. I personally have a little crush on the machine that wrings all the water out of your bathing suit so you can put it in your locker.....but that is a whole other blog....

So.....you can imagine my surprise this morning when I walked in the locker room at 8:30 after having been in the pool for an hour, to see that something was missing. I couldn't put my finger on it at first. So I shrugged it off and went to get my shower stuff from my locker.

I gathered my stuff, walked to the showers and put my stuff down in one of the stalls.

That's when it hit me......NO SHOWER CURTAINS......NONE!

I don't know what happened....maybe they were being washed, or they got new ones....or what? But I do know that they were not hanging on the rods!

I stood there like a deer in the headlights for a good two to three minutes. I had no idea what to do.....do I get in and let any number of girls see my wobblies....or do I reek of chlorine for the rest of the day....it was hands down the HARDEST DECISION OF MY LIFE!!!!!

I'm talking, it was up there with:

1) What should be my life's work? (still working on that one)
2) Should I marry this man? (oops)
3) Should I tell her she has a booger hanging out her nose? (always!)

In the end.....I just went for it.....I found a stall down at the end so that not everyone that walked through would have to see me.

I stripped down and took the fastest shower of my life! I still didn't get out without someone choosing the stall right across from me...who does that?

I wrapped up in my towel and started to walk out of the shower area. I get about half way down when I see one of the girls that was in the pool with me earlier drape her towel over the rod to use as a curtain.

Easy for the swimmers! I think. They have those big beach towels that would work perfectly for a.......well crap!

To the girl in the stall across from me....sorry.....I should have thought of the towel thing.....I mean fool me once, shame on you....fool me twice....no, shame on you again....don't pick a stall right across from someone if you can avoid it.....it's just rude!