"OOPS? No, Ed. Oops is falling down an elevator shaft. Oops is skinny dipping in a school of pirrahna. This was no OOPS. This was AAGGHH!"

First let me explain my morning....wait...let's start last night...hell...let's get a good look at this week....

Monday was a holiday....I worked....then stayed up LATE working on my physics homework.

Tuesday was spent sitting crouched over that same physics HW...then class...then work...then at work till 12:30pm finishing that HW with one of my bosses (I LOVE YOU SCOTT :)).

Wednesday was class/HW from 8 am until 8 pm....then home to read up on lab work for today.

This morning (Thursday) I woke up @ 6 (yes dang it, that is early) because I have Geology lab @ 8 am...which really is a crime in itself...but I woke up, let Chloe outside, and went into the bathroom to shower, make-up, hair....etc. Let me just say...at this point I knew I was tired and this week was taking its toll, but I was wholly unaware that I was in a bad mood.

Sometime in the middle of this ritual, I hear my roommate come out of his room and walk to the bathroom. He stops when he sees me in there, and I just turned and said, "Sucks to be you huh?"

WHAT?! He hadn't done ANYTHING wrong except walk in on me and my bad mood! I mumbled my apologies to his dropped jaw and shut the door for his protection.

When I was ready to head out, I went downstairs and saw that my other roommate had cleaned the living room and dining room while I slept (THANKS B)...normally a real mood lifter...but evidently not.

I got to school, got my soy Chai latte and went to lab...at which point I walked in right as he was beginning lecture and spilled my latte all over the table.

(aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaggggggggghhhh......normally that would be in caps, but I lack the energy...)

So I ran to the bathroom to get towels, cleaned it up and proceeded to test a bunch of rocks...

When it was over, I thought "Finally, a BREAK!" I had every intention of curling up in chair for half an hour (before starting my microbiology lab report) and reading something educationally worthless! Like a smut novel, or Harry Potter....

So on my way to my favorite cushy chair on campus, I stopped for another latte since I got 2 sips from the first one....and I saw this girl....

Let me first say that this girl was LARGE...I know large....she was MUCH larger than that... and she had one of those walking cast/boot things and one crutch (both of which I am also intimately acquainted)....all of these factors meant she was going SLOW....but come on, poor thing was probably in a worse mood than me!

So as I waited for her to pass so I could get to my cushy chair, these two guys in the frat boy uniform (polo shirt in some neon color, khaki shorts, and deck shoes) come up behind her and start loudly going "Damn! That girl is BIG."

And that's when it happened...I accidentally (on purpose) lost my second (HOT) latte of the day all down the front of their uniforms....

I really am not fit to be around people today....

"I've heard a rant like this before!" -- Dogma

Rant Day....(in no particular order)

10) Organic Chemistry is the HARDEST CLASS EVER....if you are an engineering major and you think that ALL of your classes are harder than this one...then you should have picked a different major....cuz it's just you!

9) Yes....I have read the Twilight Series and actually enjoyed it! BACK OFF!

8) No, I have not seen the Bond movies and have no immediate plans to correct this....

7) Truth is about perception....If I say you have an accent, it is because I perceive it to be true....If you say that I am the one with the accent, it is because you perceive that to be true....we are both right....can we please move on now?

6) High heels hurt. Yeah they look good, but I don't always feel like re-attaching my toes when I get home, so I don't usually wear them. If I do feel an occasion is special enough to wear heels, please do not make a big issue out of it, because odds are I will have kicked them off in about an hour anyway.

5) Yes, I am often considered "One of the Guys" in our little group, and I will shotgun a beer and belch right along with you, pound your fist when something funny is said, and laugh at fart jokes....but please remember that I am a girl....so if we are running late because I can't decide if these shoes match that purse....adjust! (And maybe this would go faster, if you would be "One of the Girls" from time to time and tell me which ones match!)

4) Chipping a nail IS a big deal...

3) I have a black thumb...plants left in my care WILL die...I have accepted this....so should you...

2) I will leave the clock on my nightstand there...yes, it has been blinking for over six months now, but I am sure I will set it eventually....leave it alone!

And the most important....

1) Irish car bombs do NOT taste like chocolate milk....what the hell kind of milk was your momma feeding you? Men the world wide try to pass this lie off on unsuspecting women...this lie is second only to "Just the tip...."!

"This book is not for you!" - The Never Ending Story

Soooo....some of my void in blogspace can be attributed to a very long vacation followed by the beginning of a HARD semester....

The other (and quite frankly MAIN) reason I have been notably absent....

Quotes from Outlander:

As yet too hungry and too clumsy for tenderness, still he made love with a sort of unflagging joy that made me think that male virginity might be a highly underrated commodity.

"When I woke, I was trussed up in the wagon wi' the chickens, jolting down the road toward Fort William." "I see," I said quietly. "I'm sorry. It must have been terrible for you." He smiled suddenly, the haze of fatigue gone. "Oh aye. Chickens are verra poor company, especially on a long journey."

"Harmless as a setting dove," he agreed. "I'm too hungry to be a threat to anything but breakfast. Let a stray bannock come within reach, though, and I'll no answer for the consequences."

Quotes from Dragonfly in Amber:

"I'll leave it to you, Sassenach," he said dryly, "to imagine what it feels like to arrive unexpectedly in the midst of a brothel, in possession of a verra large sausage."

"Weel, nay doubt he'll be a bit sore." His Scots accent, usually faint, always grew more pronounced when he drank a lot. He shook his head, squinting through the bottle to judge the level of spirit remaining. "D'ye know, Sassenach, I never 'till tonight realized just how difficult it must ha' been for my father to beat me? I always thought it was me had the hardest part of that particular transaction." He tilted his head back and drank again, then set down the bottle and stared owl-eyed into the fire. "Being a father might be a bit more complicated than I'd thought. I'll have to think about it." "Well, don't think too hard," I said, "You've had a lot to drink." "Och, don't worry," he said cheerfully. "There's another bottle in the cupboard."

"Aye, well," he said. "I dinna recall Adam's asking God to take back Eve---and look what she did to him." He leaned forward and kissed my forehead as I laughed, then drew the blanket up over my bare shoulders. "Go to sleep, my wee rib. I shall be needin' a helpmeet in the morning."

Quotes from Voyager:

"I shall not ask you again why you left the prison," he had said, calmly conversational. "But I will ask you---why did you come back?" Fraser had frozen briefly, startled. He turned back and met Grey's eyes directly. For a moment he said nothing. Then his mouth curled up in a smile. "I suppose I must value the company, Major; I can tell ye, it's not the food."

"It gets a bit easier with practice, Sassenach," he said. "Try living wi' me for a time, and ye'll find yourself spinning silk out of your arse easy as sh--, er, easy as kiss-my-hand."

"Damn you, Sassenach!" his voice said, from a very great distance. His voice was choked with passion. "Damn you! I swear if ye die on me, I'll kill you!"

Quotes from Drums of Autumn:

"I hate boats," Jamie said through clenched teeth. "I loathe boats. I view boats with the most profound abhorrence."

He turned then, and gave me a narrow eye. "What is it that makes every man ye meet want to take off his breeks within five minutes of meetin' ye?" Fergus choked slightly, and Ian went pink. I looked as demure as possible.

Brianna's eyes were round as she looked at me. "Testosterone poisoning," I said, with a shrug. "Can you do anything about it?" she asked. The corner of her mouth twitched, though I couldn't tell whether with laughter or incipient hysteria. I pushed a hand through my hair, considering. "Well," I said finally, "there are only two things they do with it, and one of them is try to kill each other." Brianna rubbed her nose. "Uh-huh," she said. "And the other one...?" Our eyes met with a perfect understanding. "I'll take care of your father," I said. "But Roger's up to you."

Quotes from The Fiery Cross:

He bent and kissed me briefly, then headed for the door. Just short of it, though, he turned back. "The, um, sperms ..." he said, a little awkwardly. "Yes?" "Can ye not take them out and give them decent burial or something?" I hid my smile in my teacup. "I'll take good care of them," I promised. "I always do, don't I?"

"I did not," he said. "What d'ye take me for, Sassenach?" "A Scot," I said. "Sex fiends, the lot of you. Or so one would think, listening to all the talk around here." I gave Farquard Campbell a hard look, but he had turned his back, engrossed in conversation. Jamie regarded me thoughtfully, scratching the corner of his jaw. "Sex fiends?" "You know what I mean." "Oh, aye, I do. I'm only wondering-is that an insult, would ye say, or a compliment?"

"You bloody, unspeakable, infuriating--" His smile was startling, a white grin in the ruddy face. "If ye call me a Scot, Sassenach, then I know I'm going to live."

Jemmy, oblivious, swung his legs up, his weight suspended momentarily from Roger's and Jamie's hands, then stomped his feet down on the floor again, recalling his original question. "Grand-da gots balls?" he asked, pulling on the men's hands and tilting his head far back to look up at Jamie. "Aye, lad, I have," Jamie said dryly. "But your Da's are bigger. Come on, then."

"When the day shall come, that we do part," he said softly, and turned to look at me, "if my last words are not 'I love you'--- ye'll ken it was because I didna have time."

And.....I haven't read this one yet....so quotes to come :)

Ignore the relative sizes.....THESE BOOKS ARE AWESOME!!! And at around 1000 pages each....I have been in my own little world....well, actually not MY world, but the world of Claire Randall and Jamie Fraser.

Got a vacation coming up? I recommend visiting them!!

These books are historical fiction and highly entertaining as well as smart and educational....I have learned more French and Gaelic curse words that you can shake a stick at.....oh and I am now more familiar with the Scottish Rebellion for the Bonny Prince and the American Revolution.....

Anyway, if you like to read.....

Yes. Doug Can Read.

Well guys, I am finally moved into my new place.....

Although I use most of those words very loosely.

Take the word my for example....technically, my stuff lives in this new house, but I do not. I had to be out of my apartment by Dec. 24 (which I made...by the skin of my teeth....and more help from Mindy than she EVER should have agreed to....LOVE YOU MINDY!!!!) Anyway, the house is a four bedroom....one of the guys and the girl that currently live there are staying and will be my new roomies! However, two of the guys that live there are on a waiting list for a condo downtown......for those of you that are mathematically inclined and just did that math in your head (mom), know that makes five people and four bedrooms.....that also means that there are three sofas, two coffee tables, two end tables, a papasan chair, a book shelf, two tv's with their own tv stands, and a huge fish tank IN THE LIVING ROOM ALONE.

Lets just say chaos reigns.....or for you scientific dorks like me....this reaction has a positive entropy.

Anyway so now I am bouncing back and forth between the new house and Mindy's....but that is soooooooooo not even the point of this blog.....

When I was packing to move, Mindy put her foot down....just like my mom did the move before this about the number of books I own......

Here is the thing......it is against my religion to throw away a book.....and I know I read a TON of ratty romance novels....but hey.....I love them! I know I could lug them down to Half-Price Books and sell them back, but like I said "ratty romance novels".....they don't exactly fetch a pretty penny.

TOTALLY NOT worth the effort! So they sit on my bookshelf....and in my car...and backpack....and side tables.....and random bathroom drawers....once even in my freezer (no idea)....

Well Mindy and I..........ok so mainly Mindy........decided that the ones that I don't re-read have to go, and since we are making a Goodwill run anyway, that is where they are headed.

Seven Hefty bags later......

Yes! I said SEVEN.....You know that moment when an alcoholic decides that they do NOT have a drinking problem but just to prove it to everyone, they go through their house and start pouring out bottles. When all is said and done, there are bottles covering both the counter and the dining room table....well, it's kinda like that!

There was Janet Evanovich, Jude Deveroux, Jennifer Cruise and Sandra Brown all strewn about in all their fabulous glory.

That's when I knew.......My name is Amy.....and I have a reading problem!

Book Club!

Mindy and I saw The Jane Austen Book Club tonight (sooo good) and in true life-imitating-art fashion, we have decided to start our own little Jane Austen book club!

We all know that I have a small obsession with Austen, so she didn't exactly drag me kicking and screaming....but I do have a few other books I am reading....Cellular Biology, Molecular Chemistry and Multivariable Calculus....so we are taking this slow.....

We are doing one book a month...I know....Austen does not take NEAR that long to get through, but again....I AM A BUSY GIRL....and let's face it, so is Mindy.....

Anyway, first we are reading Emma. We figure it will ease us into this with a little light reading....

I am so excited to read and discuss Austen AGAIN :) Please feel free to join us....I will post our discussions....PLEASE JOIN!!!